I’m quite embarrassed to tell you that there have been times that I didn’t pray for my husband. In those times, my lack of prayer for my husband wasn’t out of rebellion or malice but more out of complacency. I had other things to do and I simply forgot.
The question as to how often we pray for our husband rarely comes up in a personal encounter. It seems to be a level of accountability that crosses the privacy threshold. Oh, we hear about it in the Sunday sermons and we discuss around it in our women’s bible study groups but typically, it’s one of those questions that sounds kind of like, “How are you?” and one in which we answer, “Fine.”
Could it be that we don’t ask each other about our prayer life because no one else wants to admit they are failing at it too? I’m not sure, but if I asked you how often you prayed for your husband, REALLY prayed for your husband, what would your answer be?
In a particular season of our marriage, things were rockin’ along quite nicely. We lived in Asia and for the most part, with a fairly normal count of “episodes” and “discussions”, our relationship was pretty great. We were fine. Our church attendance was regular and we were committed to serving. We worked well together in our parenting. The trajectory of our lives was smoothly flowing in the same general direction. We were adventuring and globe-trotting and busy living life. Our date nights were consistent and we really enjoyed sharing nice meals together and expanding our pallet for just the right wine pairings.
Then, one day, we went from “rockin’ along” to seriously rocky and we found ourselves spending our date nights with a marriage counselor.
As I look back on the period of time when things were “rockin’ along”, I realized I had become complacent in regards to praying in general, but specifically for my husband.
It’s so easy to forget to pray when life is good.
Please DON’T hear me telling you that my marriage was in trouble because I wasn’t praying for my husband, but please DO hear me say that it definitely wouldn’t have hurt.
Wives, the bottom line is this:
Praying for our husbands is vital. It won’t always keep us from experiencing trials in our marriage, but as C.S. Lewis said,
“I pray because I can’t help myself. I pray because I’m helpless. I pray because the need flows out of me all the time, waking and sleeping. It doesn’t change God. It changes me.”
I pray for my husband now because it changes me. It changes my attitude towards him. It makes me kinder and gentler and removes the anger and bitterness towards him that threatens to take over. I have found it to be impossible to not like someone I am praying for.
If you want to love your husband well, pray for him.
No matter what your relationship is like with your husband as you read this, here are a few practical tips for how you can pray for your husband:
- Pray for protection over each part of his body as you do the laundry.
- Pray for him to honor God in his work as you make your bed in the morning.
- Pray for him to walk in wisdom as you move his shoes or pick up his socks – again.
- As you wash your hair, pray for purity over your husband’s thought life.
- Read a chapter of Proverbs each day and follow God’s promptings as you pray for your husband.
- Set alarms on your phone at strategic times throughout the day to remind you to pray for him.
Don’t forget to pray for your husband. Your prayers may or may not change your husband, but your prayers will most definitely change you.