When two people come together in marriage, they are bringing different opinions, different upbringings, different communication styles, and different convictions along with them. While these differences may have been what initially attracted the couple to each other, they can also be the source of extremely difficult conflict down the road.
If this sounds familiar to you, you are not alone. This type of conflict can seem scary and startling at first, but it’s not uncommon. Sometimes the best way to get through it is to find outside help.
When you can’t see eye to eye on important subjects, like faith or major parenting decisions, or when serious behavioral issues have driven a wedge between you and your spouse, like addiction or infidelity, how should you go about seeking counsel for your marriage?
Kirk Cameron recently answered this question in his weekly video series inside the exclusive community called The Campfire. While Kirk admits that he is not a marriage therapist, he has learned quite a bit over the last 27 years of marriage to his wife Chelsea Cameron.
He first shares where you shouldn’t go for marriage counsel. “It shouldn’t be from friends who have a poor track record of relationships. If they’re not the kind of people that you want to become, don’t get wisdom from them.”
Even if you do have trusted friends or family members, Kirk cautions you from talking to them about your marital conflict separate from your spouse.
“If you go to one of your parents and begin talking and sharing private information that your spouse may not be comfortable with you sharing with them, it already creates a scenario where it’s you against them (your spouse).”
Kirk shares who you should turn to when seeking help. If you do choose to go to a family member or friend, he says you should go together with your spouse. He also reminds us that we have a Mighty Counselor in God, and that we should always seek counsel in His Word.